I am confused as to why the first action towards what we want can sometimes be so frightful. It could be something as simple as introducing yourself to a person you have attraction for or as complex as quitting your job to start your own company. If these things are what we really want then why are we so afraid to take the first step?
Anthony Robbins, the international performance coach, would say that person has associated more pain towards the thought of possible failure than success. But, the question is why would we make that association in the first place? Why would we hinder our own chance to claim a goal that we set out to accomplish? Make no logical sense.
I honestly think we just don’t want it bad enough; we haven’t developed enough desire for the attainment of what we want. So, we give ourselves a million and one excuses as to why we shouldn’t have or do something. Consider this – if we were starving and if we don’t eat within the next 2 minutes, we will die. (I know this is a bit extreme but go with me on this.) However, there is a plate of food on the other side of a ring of fire and the only way to get it is to jump through. What would you do?
It amazes me how much we wait until we are backed into a corner to take action. But, when we do have the time we choose to sabotage ourselves by considering all the possible reasons not to do something. This utterly confuses me. <Moment of silence>
I agree it’s not always easy to raise our desire for something but, I can guarantee you will have a better chance if you change from focusing on the negative and more on what you want. Instead of asking ourselves “what if” questions, start asking ourselves “how” questions.
For instance, take the examples above instead of asking “what if she isn’t interested in me?” or “what if starting my business is a huge mistake?” These “what if” questions won’t help us to accomplish what we set out to do. If a boxer isn’t 100% focused in the ring, even his weakest of opponents will beat him.
However if you ask a “how” question you will be one step close to attaining your goal. “How can I go over there and talk to that girl and enjoy the whole process?” , “How can I overcome my fear of failure so my business and I can succeed?”
So the next time you want to take first action and you feel afraid just ask yourself how you can do it and wait for the answer, your own mind will surprise you. |
